Last Hour of 2008

In some (better) parts of the world, 2008 has already ended. The time differences across the world had the biggest impact on me in 1999 when several parts of the world had already entered the new millenium. News stations were calling China all day to ask if the world had ended. Could they not tell themselves?

Earlier I read a poem by Alfred Lord Tennyson about the "old year" dying. It was no "Ulysses," but a nice accidental read for today.

I thought I'd take a moment to list some of the things that happened in 2008:

My parents celebrated their 25th anniversary.
I turned 18.
My brother turned 21.
My mom turned 50.
The Summer Olympics were held in Beijing.
I graduated high school.
I began college.
I voted for the first time ever.
Barack Obama was elected the first biracial president of the United States.

Basically, more milestones than should ever happen in one year. In addition, there were more personal milestones for me that I'd rather not write about on here. What I'm trying to get at is that 2008 was a remarkable year. I anticipate a calmer, more normal 2009. Or, as normal as a year can be when you don't know where you're going and every day you discover a new truth, a new friend and a new direction.

Less than an hour left.

I'm home alone. All plans fell through. If I weren't imprisoned by that ridiculous "no driving on New Year's Eve" rule (ok, it's a legitimate rule, but I don't see any of my friends subjected to a similar fate), I could be party-hopping with Clay, on my way to Glen Rose, or taking a last drive with Max before he returns to Michigan.

Is this supposed to foreshadow the rest of the year? Being alone and battling between depression at my missed opportunities and bleak apathy to not care about silly things like New Years?

Last year, I knew what was coming. I was going to turn 18, graduate, start college, vote. There would be the Olympics and election buzz. Sure, it was all scary and an emotional roller coaster, but I knew that going into it.

What does 2009 hold? I have no fucking idea.

So here's me: over analyzing everything and simultaneously convincing myself that there is no cosmological-symbolic reasoning for anything in this universe. Here's me playing the tough misanthrope who sees no reason why tonight should be unlike any other, while I honestly want nothing more than to be at a party with a glass of champagne to toast and a boy to kiss at midnight.

2009 is a prime number. It's not divisible by anything. It stands on its own. Strong? Or lonely? I guess we'll find out at the end of this hour. Except that they already know in other (better) parts of the world. Maybe I'll call up China....Ni hao ma? Qing wen....